The Path of Change

Wealth consists not in having great possessions but in having few wants. ~ Esther De Waal

The past few days I've felt a lot of emotions from anxiety to elation.  It is a time of dissonance because it is the convergence of many thoughts and long awaited dreams battling for their place among your final list of goals.  Coming to the realization that things are not what you want them to be is only the beginning of your walk along the path of change.  There will be many adjustments to make and obstacles to overcome, and you will need to spend some time alone figuring out what it is you really desire.  But, as it is often said, most things in life worth achieving require some work.

I have already begun to make some small changes to the way I spend my time.   This week, I have thrown out 20 things, made some room in the nursery for the new baby, thought about and planned my nutrition intake, eaten healthy home cooked meals, spent some time outdoors, and enjoyed special moments with my family.  But the thing that has caused the most anxiety is figuring out my bigger purpose and how to overcome the obstacles that stand in my way.

I have learned that among the vast possibilities available to us we must narrow them down to a few simple wants.  On the surface certain goals may seem very desirable, but we should analyze our motivations and figure out what is most important to us.  Is medicine a prestigious and fruitful career to embark on?  I believe so, but is it for everyone?  Of course not.  Whatever you choose to do it should be for the right reasons, and one of the best ways to know if you are choosing a particular path for the right reasons is to first acknowledge the things you value most in life; the principles you live by.

If you find yourself going from one idea to another unable to settle on one path it is possible that you are allowing external influences to interfere with your own understanding of who you are and what you want.  The people I have known who flutter from one hobby, lifestyle, or career goal to another also seem to be the most confused about their identity.  If any of this sounds familiar you could start by asking yourself some simple questions like:

What inspires and motivates you?
On what occasions do you feel truly happy?
What kind of accomplishments have been most meaningful to you?
What do you value most in life?

Depending on where you stand with your knowledge of yourself and your purpose, these questions may be inspiring or frustrating.  If this is not the first time you have tried to identify your skills and desires, I encourage you to push through the frustration and begin again.  Clear your mind and forget what you think seem like good paths to follow and allow yourself to explore who you are first.

Aside from confusion, the restlessness and anxiety that accompany this time can also be to do with wanting the results before you have put in the work.  Once you begin on the path you are eager to jump in and yield the rewards, especially if you already feel like you are behind, but it takes time and work to make things happen.  Don't lose your momentum, but understand that the seeds you are sowing need time to grow. 

A New Challenge

It's almost April and I can feel that Spring is already upon us. This is a great time to get outdoors by yourself or with family and friends, and soak up the vitamin D!

My last challenge focused on how to think consciously about our finances. Through our 30 Day Challenge to buy generic food, I learned that groceries don't have to be as expensive as I thought. That is a lesson I put into practice by continuing to buy generic groceries where possible, and looking for the cheapest and best value products. We found that switching to cheaper alternatives didn't affect the quality or taste of our meals. Some things may have had a very slight difference in flavour, but most things seemed the same. 

Shopping mindfully was a surprisingly easy transition.  It really only required a little extra time at the store to compare products and a little planning, so that the we knew what we needed to buy for all our meals each week.  Though we mainly conquered the grocery store, we will continue to explore different ways to live more frugal in all areas, and I expect to come back to this topic of finances in the future.

This month, however, we will move forward with our plan to live more consciously by exploring how we spend our time.  What we do on a daily basis really affects the way our lives, as a whole, unfold.  Not only on a short term basis, but our ultimate path too. Most of us go to work, and then fill our time with all kinds of activities alone, with friends, or with family. But do we take stock of everything we do, making sure that we are living each day to the fullest, or do we simply go through the motions?

For the next 30 days I am going to keep a log of everything I do and attempt to make more conscious decisions about how I spend my time.  I have written a list of activities that fall into four categories: Physical, Mental/Emotional, Goal Seeking, and Maintenance.  I will use my list as a guide to help me understand how my time is divided and to assist me in making good decisions.

Here is a breakdown of my four categories:

1. Physical - Probably the most obvious of the four, this pertains to things like exercise, nutrition, sleep and rest.
2. Mental/Emotional - This encompasses relaxation, stress management, meditation, and prayer.
3. Goal Seeking - Developing and achieving values, learning, creating, honing crafts and skills, and pursuing personal and professional goals.
4. Maintenance - Organization, planning, cleaning, and maintaining relationships with others.

Many people have their own set of categories based on their own values and needs.  Stephen R. Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, calls them the Four Dimensions of Renewal.  I like the term renewal because that's really what you are doing when you continue to dedicate yourself to conscious thought on a daily basis.  Each time you take a moment to consider or review an action you are renewing your mind and realigning yourself with what is important to you.  As I have said before, it is so easy to stray from the path.  That's why having a system for staying on track is important, and rededicating yourself daily to live consciously and knowing and analyzing how you spend your time is an important activity.

I will likely add to my categories as I explore each area more fully, but initially I just wanted to have a basic idea of how I normally spend my time and what was important to me.  Each of these four areas are important for my general well being and for feeling a sense of fulfillment in my daily life.  The goal seeking category should also help me to find a deeper and bigger fulfillment by allowing me to pursue my larger purpose.

For this challenge I want to be sure that I'm spending an equal amount of time in each of these areas, and that the quality of the activity that falls under these categories is high.  In other words, I want to make sure that my relaxation time is not consistently and solely spent watching television.  I come back to television a lot because it is one of my personal blocks to conscious and productive living and an easy way to avoid other more meaningful, though challenging, tasks and activities. 

My hope is that by the end of this challenge I will not only have learned to live a more valuable, productive, and well managed life, but also to have found a renewed sense of peace and purpose that would, otherwise, have escaped me.

The Mental Disconnect

What prevents you from living consciously on a daily basis?  With a full time job and a one year old, I often feel tired and stretched to a breaking point.  On top of that, there are so many ways to improve myself and goals to achieve that it can be difficult knowing where to begin.  Here are some of the common obstacles and pitfalls to living a conscious life, and some tips on how to stay on track.

The Issue: Time and Energy 

Life can be busy and how you manage it affects what you are able to achieve each day.  The first step in managing your time is to make sure you don't take on too much in the first place.  Take stock of everything you do in a typical day or week and decide if there are things that can be removed.  Sometimes it's not what you would imagine that consumes important chunks of your day.  As I've mentioned in previous posts, often it is not until you look closely at something and keep track that you realize how bad off you are.  (Think of a food journal, or spending log!) 

The Solution: Analyze and Reassess
I know it's tempting to fall onto the couch after a long day and turn on the television or throw a video game in the console, but these are things we do to mentally disconnect from our lives.  Though we all need time to relax, you should analyze how much time goes to frivolous activities and how much time goes to self-improvement and maintenance.  As always, it is your values and goals that are important here.  I know that it is not a true value or goal for me to spend the limited time I have in the evenings watching television. However, when I'm tired after work and feel like I need to put my feet up and decompress, I have often reached for the remote. 

Watching a little television, or playing a video game is not necessarily bad or wrong, it is the amount of time you give to it that can be a problem, so limiting it is an option.  If you don't feel you can detach yourself, initially, you could have someone in your household put a password on the system, or you could remove the console or cable altogether.  However, I encourage you to work toward self-control and trust in your own ability to follow your values and beliefs.

You should also make a list of some things you would like to incorporate into your daily life that fit with your values and goals and then try replacing the activity you want to limit with one of the activities on the list. It may be that you want to get outside more, and at the moment you spend most of your time indoors watching television.  It may be hard at first to find the energy or motivation to go for a walk, but studies show that exercise actually increases your energy levels over time, and there is a lot to be gained, mentally too, from getting outside and raising your heart rate.

Finally, don't forget to get enough sleep.  Rest is very important for both your body and mind.  If you want to function at peak ability you will need to get some quality sleep.  That means going to bed at a reasonable time, and at the same time everyday and waking at the same time too.  Too much or too little sleep can have a negative impact on your mood and motivation, so don't forget to include your sleep patterns in your analysis.

The Issue: Physical Clutter
You've heard the saying "A tidy house is a tidy mind", or some version of this. From my own experience, I strongly believe that physical clutter creates a debilitating mental block.  The more clutter you have the harder it is to get anything done.  Ordinary, yet important things like staying on top of bills, managing your weight, how you spend your time, and achieving personal goals can all fall victim to the mental fog created by your cluttered environment, and this mental fog will not help you keep a conscious mind.

One situation that has awoken me to this truth is going on vacation and staying in a hotel.  Hotel rooms are empty of clutter.  They house empty furniture which you fill upon your arrival.  Except, I don't know about you, but I've never actually "filled" all of the furniture in a hotel room.  My clothes fit neatly into the wardrobe and drawers, my journal, books, and sleeping aids all sit neatly on the bedside table or in the draw.  You get the point!  I find it incredibly freeing to stay in a hotel with my limited possessions and I don't miss or want for anything sitting at home.  So, the question remains, why do we have so much stuff and what do we do about it?

The Solution: Get Organized
The reasons why we may have a lot of possessions are varied.  You may have a tendency to hoard and develop sentimental attachments to things, or you may just be a procrastinator or both.  Sometimes, if you are very disorganized, you might find yourself purchasing items that you already have tucked away somewhere at home.  It could also be as simple as never truly assessing what you own.  I believe that a lot of the barriers to living a conscious life are interrelated, and you may even find yourself in a vicious cycle of bad habits where one thing seems to cause another.  But you have to begin somewhere, and home is probably a good place to begin. 

A great tip I picked up from an author by the name of Gail Blanke is to start by throwing out 50 things.  I think this works well for someone who has difficulty getting started on what seems like an overwhelming task such as de-cluttering an entire room or house.  Instead of looking at the big picture, you are simply saying you are going to throw out a finite number (50 in this case) of things that you no longer need. 

Stacks of paperwork or magazines are considered one item, but things like a broken umbrella (unless for some reason you are a collector) would not be grouped with anything else and would also count as one item.  Be sure not to bring anything new into your home, where possible, while you are trying to declutter, since you may end up replacing many of the items you are throwing out.  Once you have completed this initial challenge you should feel good about what you have accomplished and, if there is more decluttering to be done, you should already feel more motivated to get the job done.  Expand your challenge to throw out another 50 things.


The Issue: Procrastination or Avoidance
With all the responsibilities that come with the various hats we wear, it is inevitable that some tasks feel quite arduous and unappealing.  But even when we have goals and desires, though the end result might be extremely appealing, sometimes the path we have to travel to get there isn't quite so desirable.  In fact, it can be just plain hard work, and in a society with ever increasing demands on time and speed - the want everything now mentality - it's no wonder we feel put off at times.  I wonder if we have forgotten what true hard work is. 

What do you tell yourself when faced with a task?  I know two of my common thought processes are 1) I have to be in the right frame of mind in order to be successful, and 2) I will miraculously find myself in a better mood, with more energy, or even more determination to tackle the task on another day.  Sadly, this is often not the case, so putting it off only increases my stress and feelings of being overwhelmed by the task at hand.

The Solution: Self-regulation
There is no quick fix for procrastination (fitting, isn't it?)  If there were, I think it might defeat the object here.  Procrastination can become a lifestyle if we let it.  It can cut across many or all areas of our life from our finances to our social life.  I can't tell you to go out and buy a planner, or instruct you to start making lists.  While these things can be helpful tools for someone who is just a little disorganized, alone they are unlikely to help a chronic procrastinator for the simple reason that procrastination often comes down to an inability to self-regulate.   Therefore, my suggestion is that you begin to work on self-regulation techniques. 

Start with something small to focus on such as a simple exercise routine.  Make a plan to follow it a couple of times a week and stick to it.  If exercise isn't a good fit for you, focus on your sleeping patterns.  Make a plan to start a nightly sleep ritual and go to bed at the same time everyday and stick to it.  This has a dual purpose since it is not only going to help you learn self-regulation, but also improve your energy and ability to function.  In addition, sleep itself is said to restore your ability to self-regulate.  It doesn't really matter what you choose, but make it something simple and don't try to do too many things at once. 

You may be able to come up with a few other issues that affect your ability to live a conscious life and if you do, I encourage you to work through the problem until you find a solution.  In the meantime, hopefully this will give you a clear place to start.

Eat All Your Veggies! (And Fruit)

If you're wondering what to do with all those fruits and vegetables you got from the farmers market, check out some recipes here: http://www.wvfarmers.org/recipes.html.  There are lots of delicious meals and treats you can prepare to make sure that none of your fresh produce goes to waste.  Here's one recipe that I tried with that big basket of peaches we bought.  It was fun and easy to cook and those peaches were just as delicious cooked as they were fresh.

Peach Cobbler Paula Deen, Food Network.

Ingredients

• 4 cups peeled, sliced peaches
• 2 cups sugar, divided
• 1/2 cup water
• 8 tablespoons butter
• 1 1/2 cups self-rising flour
• 1 1/2 cups milk
• Ground cinnamon, optional

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Combine the peaches, 1 cup sugar, and water in a saucepan and mix well. Bring to a boil and simmer for 10 minutes. Remove from the heat.
Put the butter in a 3-quart baking dish and place in oven to melt.
Mix remaining 1 cup sugar, flour, and milk slowly to prevent clumping. Pour mixture over melted butter. Do not stir. Spoon fruit on top, gently pouring in syrup. Sprinkle top with ground cinnamon, if using. Batter will rise to top during baking. Bake for 30 to 45 minutes.
To serve, scoop onto a plate and serve with your choice of whipped cream or vanilla ice cream.

Enjoy!

A trip to the Farmers Market

I have always heard that it is best to buy local produce, and I was curious to find out if shopping for produce outside the walls of the grocery store would be cheaper. So, last week I researched some local farmers markets, found that there is one about 2 miles from here, and made a date with my family to go and check it out.

The Central City Farmers Market opens at 7:00am and continues until all produce has been sold, so my plan was to get up early Saturday morning to avoid the heat and get first pick of the produce. But, try as I might, getting up at 6:00am and getting ready to go out with a five month old baby (and a sleepy husband) is not always easy.  When we arrived around 10:00am, however, the market was bustling and there were plenty of fruits and vegetables still to choose from.

While I was on the hunt for some green peppers,  my husband disappeared to a stall selling hot peppers, and before I had turned around he was already handing over some cash.  After that we found some nice tomatoes that were $3 for a bowl, and some green peppers which were a steal at $1 per bowl.  But, the best purchase we made had to be the peaches from Floyd's Produce and Flowers (pictured above).  As you can see they looked absolutely wonderful.  The colour and feel of the peaches were exactly as they should be, and the fragrance was divine.  We had already decided to give these peaches a try at $5 a basket when the vendor asked if we had tasted them yet.  She gave each of us a piece to try and, if we truly hadn't been sold before, we would now.  They were the sweetest, juiciest peaches I have ever tasted.

We were able to get a few items on our list, plus some fruit, but we did have to go to the store to pick up some extra items that were not available at the farmers market. Really, we should eat only what is available at a local farmers market because these are the fruits and vegetables that are fresh and available during the current season where you live.  If they are not available, this means they cannot be grown, or harvested locally, so any produce you buy at the store that is out of season has been imported and is not likely to be as fresh.

It was a little overwhelming at first because there were several sellers to choose from and each had their own price.  At the grocery store you are left alone to browse and put what you want in the cart without any interaction from staff, but at the farmers market you have to interact with each seller on every item you want to purchase.  In a way, shopping for the best deal on fruits and vegetables at the store is easier because each fruit or vegetable is placed together in one area.  At the farmers market you have to go to each stall to compare prices, feel and appearance.  However, you also can't barter at the grocery store and you know the fruits and vegetables are not freshly picked that day.  Chances are they have been picked, packaged, shipped, and stored, and then regularly dusted with a spray of water to keep them looking fresh.

The big question is - will shopping at the farmers market save you money?  At $1.00 per bowl, which contains around 6 medium sized green peppers, I know we could not have got this cheaper at the store.  In fact, a pack of 3 at our local grocery store costs $2.00.  Individually, they cost around $0.50.  We frequently buy tomatoes for around $3.00 a pack and we purchased double that amount for the same price.  Not only were they cheaper, but they last longer too.  The reason is because, when you buy produce at the store it has already been stored for a while.  In fact, you don't know how long ago the fruits or vegetables were picked, but at the farmers market where everything is picked that morning, you can rest assured that it will be in your refrigerator with a far greater lifespan than store bought produce.  So, if you're concerned about having too much, trust me, it won't go to waste!

I recommend looking into seasonal recipes to go along with your fruit and vegetables.  That way you can adapt to eating seasonally and build a good repertoire of meals to enjoy based on what is available locally.  Even though our farmers market is relatively small compared to others further away, we still plan on going back for our produce staples, at least until the market closes for the winter.  If you have never been to one, I encourage you to seek one out in your area and give it a try!

Why save money?

For me, saving money where I can is important because with one income and three mouths to feed, clearly we are on a limited budget.  But, why bother shopping for the best deals and even buy generic groceries if your income isn't quite so limited?

It's all about choices.  When money is not an issue it's easy to just grab whatever you want off the shelves.  I know when I have had more disposable income that I have been more inclined to splash out on that expensive brand of make-up, or finally get that iPod I've wanted.  But, mindless buying means that you are not paying attention to your options and making informed decisions.  Just because you have the money doesn't mean you should buy that iPod, or buy the expensive brand of anything.  And, the worst kind of mindless shopping is the infamous impulse buy.

We've all been there whether it be groceries, clothes, electronics, even gum, at one time or another you have picked something up that you didn't plan to and purchased it.  If you know anything about marketing, you'll know that chances are the store you purchased from saw you coming a mile away.  It's common knowledge that grocery stores place small, relatively inexpensive items such as magazines, candy bars, and gum near the registers, so that you get a good look while you're waiting in line to pay.  I have been known to buy a candy bar because I've waited too long to eat, but the most common item I grab at the register is a bottle of water or soda. 

I have been terrible at making sure I stay hydrated lately, and we often shop for groceries after I get off work, so it's a common occurrence that I find myself to be in desperate need of something to drink by the time we are checking out.  Two bottles of water, soda, or whatever (because the hubby has to get one too, of course!) cost around $3.00.  Let's say you do this once a week, that's $12 per month, and $144 per year!  It gets worse if you factor in any other time that you pick up a quick thirst quencher of the 16oz variety.  For example, how often do you grab a cold drink when you stop by the gas station to fill up?

The crazy thing is that you can buy a 32oz bottle of soda for less than $2.00, so we are simply paying for the convenience of being able to grab a cold drink on the go.  If you have never tracked your expenses, or haven't done so for a while, I strongly recommend doing so for a couple of weeks, or a month.  You would be surprised how much you can spend when you are not paying attention.  It's a bit like eating without keeping track.  Sometimes you don't realize how badly you have been eating until you write it all down for a week or so.  In order to live a more conscious life it's important to be aware of of all your expenses so that you know where you stand and can then begin to make better choices.

It's not just about saving money, it's about being conscious of how your decisions impact your life, and in turn, impact the world.  Perhaps you have determined that you're okay with splashing out on new clothes every month, but wouldn't you rather put that money you spent on drinks at the gas station toward coffee with a friend, dinner with your significant other, or that new suit?  Or, perhaps there is an organization or church that you have been wanting to give a donation to, but have yet to find the money in your income to give.  Your values and goals are your own, but if you become more aware of what you are spending and where you can save, then you can spend in better alignment with those values and goals.

30 day Challenge: Generic Vs Brand Groceries

This month we have decided to focus our attention on our finances.  Part of living consciously means being aware of what is happening in your life, and where you can make positive changes. So, over the next 30 days, we will buy only generic, or cheapest alternative groceries.

This week, instead of grabbing our usual brands from the shelves, we looked for the cheapest alternative.  Our rules were: 1) If a comparable generic version was available we had to buy it, and 2) If a generic version was not available, we were to find the cheapest alternative available. The above picture is a small sample of some of the choices we made. 

I was surprised by the lack of generic items available for some of our common meal ingredients.  I had anticipated almost all of our purchases being generic, so I was a little disappointed that we didn't get to see a buggy full of "great value" products.  We did, however, make some interesting discoveries. 

The greatest saving was buying Great Value dairy products such as margarine instead of our usual brand.  A large tub of Country Crock sets you back $3.38.  Seems reasonable, especially considering how long it lasts, but the Great value brand only cost us $2.14, which is a saving of $1.24. A half pound block of swiss cheese was $1.06 less than the brand alternative, and we saved $0.90 on sour cream. This is coupon savings without the hassle of clipping and using them!

Some of the other Great Value products were only 10 cents cheaper than its brand equivalent, and it was sometimes harder to justify buying the generic product instead of our usual brand option.  I won't go into the five minute debate in the frozen dessert isle, but let's just say that we walked away with a tub of generic ice cream.  It's understandable that such a small saving could cause you to rethink buying generic.  As we concluded, however, 10 cents here and there soon adds up, and if you're trying to save money, or the product is just as tasty and nutritious (or innutrtious, as the case may be) then there are some good overall savings to be made.

In the interest of full disclosure and honesty, I have to say that I did not buy the cheapest coffee.  The ONLY reason is because I have already tried just about every brand available, being somewhat of a coffee connoisseur, and I have figured out which ones offer the best flavour, freshness, and value for money.  (In case you are interested, it is Seattle's Best!)  

One discovery we did not expect to make was that one or two of our usual products were actually cheaper than the generic version.  For example, the Birds Eye Frozen Stir Fry vegetables cost $1.78 compared to the Great Value alternative, which was $1.88.  We also bought a frozen ready meal, which was $3.68 compared to Great Value's $6.00.  So, something to keep in mind when shopping for the best deals on groceries is that generic isn't always cheaper. 

It would also be a good idea to consider alternative brands besides generic.  Pillsbury yellow cake mix was $1.00 compared to our usual Betty Crocker cake mix at $1.14, and the Pillsbury icing was $1.50 compared to the Betty Crocker icing which is $1.62.  I would like to have bought generic bread because at $0.78 a loaf that would have been a tremendous saving, but they did not have a whole wheat option.

This was just the first week of shopping consciously for the best deal on groceries and I have to say that we did notice an immediate difference in the overall cost.  The last time I remember spending close to this amount was during a difficult financial time when we were eating a lot of eggs, pasta, and PB&J's. This time we were feasting on steak sandwiches, cous cous, chicken, enchiladas and more. We didn't need to buy any cleaning supplies or other household items this time around, so it will be interesting to see what happens to our bill during our next trip to the grocery store.